Filing for divorce is one of the most emotionally difficult things you will go through. The process can be overwhelming and frustrating. However, divorce doesn’t happen in an instant. Before filing for divorce, you need to take the right steps to prepare yourself for the process. When you are proactive about what you need to do, you can set yourself up for a far less stressful process.
Before filing for divorce, you need to begin obtaining, gathering, and organizing all the important paperwork you will need. This includes all your marriage documents, proof of income for both spouses, life insurance policies, estate planning documents (such as wills, living wills, trust documents, power of attorney, or advance healthcare directives), and most importantly, your financial documents. This includes:
You don’t necessarily need to take your divorce to trial or have your settlement handed down by a judge, but you should absolutely consult with a Toledo divorce lawyer, even if you think you can have an amicable divorce. Having your own divorce attorney means that you have someone there to protect your rights and best interests, give you the correct advice about what you should and shouldn’t do during the divorce process, and save you a huge amount of emotional stress and time. When a marriage ends, it is emotional for both spouses, but your attorney isn’t emotionally invested in the process. Having a divorce lawyer means you have someone who can look at the clear picture and direct you in a way that will protect your future.
If you have children, your final divorce agreement will have the details of your custody arrangement and child support. However, the divorce process can take a while, and you need to make sure you’ve made temporary arrangements for a parenting agreement that will see you through the process. Sketch out a plan, including how much time each parent will spend with the children, how you’ll split holidays and school breaks, and how you will make decisions regarding your children. Create a calendar to track when the children are with each parent, as well as a budget for expenses related to the children and who has paid for what. If there are any issues with communication, expenses, or visitation, begin to document everything. In the case of a contentious divorce, it may be smarter to communicate everything in writing to avoid any miscommunication issues. During the temporary order, you and your Toledo divorce lawyer can begin to draft the custody and child support agreement you will need once the divorce is final.
Before filing for divorce, make a plan for how you will separate yourself from your spouse. Although it may feel logical that one spouse will move out immediately after – or even prior to – filing for divorce, this is not always in your best interest. One spouse leaving the shared home can affect the interest you have in the property, and if the property decision comes down to a judge, they may side with the spouse who remained in the home. If one spouse does choose to move out, both spouses should continue to contribute to the mortgage and document all payments. As you settle on what your new living arrangements will be, look at your finances and set a post-divorce budget based on your income alone and work on living within that budget during the divorce process. This is also the time to begin to separate yourself financially. Open a new bank account in your name, get a P.O. box for important mail, and make sure that your credit report is accurate and protected.
The divorce that gives both spouses the best new start in life are the ones where both spouses can agree to be civil and fair. Gather your support system so you have a place to vent, a shoulder to cry on, or someone who will take your side no matter what, and then take the high road when dealing with your spouse. There is a reason your spouse will soon be an ex, and your focus should be not on the breakdown of your marriage, but on how you will build your new future. Your Toledo divorce lawyer can help guide you through the process and lead you to the best possible outcome.
Divorce is stressful and overwhelming, but it doesn’t need to be catastrophic. With the right planning and an experienced Toledo divorce attorney by your side, you can make it through and begin your new life stronger than you were before. If you’re going through a divorce or planning to file for divorce and you’re looking for a trusted, experienced divorce lawyer, please contact my office today.